


Hanahaki Dream

by cianalikesbeans



Category: None - Fandom
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Forbidden Love, Gen, Hanahaki Disease, Sad with a Happy Ending, Soulmates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-12
Updated: 2020-07-12
Packaged: 2021-03-04 22:47:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,104
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25214173
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cianalikesbeans/pseuds/cianalikesbeans
Summary: You stare at your palm, the blue petals that had emerged from your own body laying innocently on your skin as if it hadn't caused you to go through intense pain. You knew exactly what this meant. It didn't alarm you when you suddenly began throwing up lilies. You knew it was bound to happen due to the circumstances you were in. Yet you couldn't help but feel the dread creeping up over you as the pressure of making the right decision came.You had caught the Hanahaki disease… and as if it wasn't already bad enough, you had apparently fallen in love with someone who didn't exist.
Relationships: Reader/Character
Comments: 8
Kudos: 26





	Hanahaki Dream

You stare at your palm, the blue petals that had emerged from your own body laying innocently on your skin as if it hadn't caused you to go through intense pain. You knew exactly what this meant. It didn't alarm you when you suddenly began throwing up lilies. You knew it was bound to happen due to the circumstances you were in. Yet you couldn't help but feel the dread creeping up over you as the pressure of making the right decision came.

You had caught the Hanahaki disease… and as if it wasn't already bad enough, you had apparently fallen in love with someone who didn't exist. No hope. Your love had no hope to be requited at all. Your options were much more limited, either you went through surgery which could potentially rid of any memories of you loved one… or you accepted fate and eventually died along with it.

You switched off the water you had left running and stared at yourself in the mirror. Your bloodshot eyes made it obvious you hadn't been sleeping well this past few days. Your skin, oily and definitely clear. Your hair reeked of having not taken a bath in so long. And your eyes that had lost its spark.

Life had already gotten to you. It was already a miracle that you decided to keep on living despite everything in your life going wrong. You really would've ended it all long ago, seeing as your life didn't have any visible future… that was until you met them.

The love of your life. The only one who could place a smile on your face no matter what. The one you looked forward to seeing after a draining day at work. The one that made you feel like life was worth giving a second chance to. The one that had saved your life… and the one who couldn't be with you at all despite you needing them the most.

It was all very painful, but you pushed those facts aside. As long as they kept you going, you didn't care. They were your whole world and your only motivation… but they were also the one who would be the cause of your very death soon enough.

_______

Your hands gripped on the railing as your whole body shook from the sudden stop. You were on a crowded train, on your way to work. You leaned your head against the window as you stared at the buildings passing by, feeling your stomach bubble as the lilies began to pile up once again. You knew you were bound to throw up soon, but you just had no energy to do anything about it. You figured you'd just suffer through it until you finally find the motivation to actually do something.

You huffed to yourself as the last remaining people exited the train and you followed closely behind. After the short and painful discovery that you had caught the disease, you found yourself grow weaker and finding it harder to complete daily living tasks. You also couldn't bare to look at your loved one as of now, having a bit of anger that they drove you into this pit of madness. Nevertheless, you knew you'd come crawling back to them once you realize the depression was too much for you to handle.

You step into the cafe you worked in, your usual coworkers greeting you with a smile. As usual, you responded with a simple wave and logged yourself in, getting ready for another busy day at work. You braced yourself for the usual chaos, your coworkers telling you to smile more, and the occasional lousy customers deciding to cause trouble. In the end, you only looked forward to being able to head home.

You rushed back and forth, tending to tables and making drinks. It was all going the way everyday used to, the same old cycle; yet you would never wish for anything to change it. You were perfectly fine with the usual routine at work and would rather die than have anything disrupt the process. It was going well, until you realized something you had forgotten.

You'd forgotten the single most important thing, but it was already too late for you to do anything about it. You crumbled to the ground, the cup you were holding crashing next to you. The thousand pieces of the broken ceramic spread out on the carpet, soon joined by the blue petals uncontrollably coming out of your system. You knew you'd messed up. You'd attracted unwanted attention and brought inconvenience whether big or small to anyone in the same room as you.

As your coworkers bustled around, calling an ambulance to pick you up and comforting you to the best of your abilities, your mind could only stay on one thing. Them. You'd failed to get your daily dose of their presence this morning due to some petty anger… even so, you knew you needed them the most right now.

You just silently wished, that they would somehow appear in the same world as you and engulf you in a hug. You wanted them to tell you it was okay and that they were there. You wanted to feel the usual happiness you felt when you were with them. You just wanted them… to love you back. They were bitter wishes, but that never stopped you from believing there was actually a chance.

Instead, you were left with the unending amount of blue lilies coming out of your body against your own will. Somehow, you hoped their favorite flower would be lilies at the very least. Maybe then, you'd be able to cope easier.

________

You were given two options. Either would lead to certain death anyways. Take surgery to get rid of disease with the high risk of forgetting anything about them… or let it be and slowly await your death. Either felt like they had the same outcome. What even was the point if they were your life to begin with?

As you went on your way to exit the clinic, you could already hear the judgmental whispers on your way out. The rising of the Hanahaki Disease has caused fear to be placed in many people's hearts, as a result, many have been deemed afraid to fall in love from the possibility of rejection. So whenever someone caught the disease, they were pitied, and their choice of how to deal with it is heavily reprimanded no matter what.

Taking the surgery would put the assumption that you valued your life more than anything else and that your love wasn't strong enough to begin with. Not taking it, however, only earned you the reputation for being a hopeless romantic. They saw you as too desperate. Despite your life being on the line, you'd rather die than have your love disappear. They'd say that you were, perhaps, too caught up in your own world. They saw you as too vulnerable and naive to love.

You clenched your fists as you begrudgingly went on your way home. You knew you wouldn't regret your decision not to take the surgery. You didn't want to be like everyone else, you didn't want to be like those who thought love was only a burden to life. Falling in love with someone saved your life, if they were real, you certainly would be doing much better. Even if they didn't, you didn't care. They were still them. They still saved you. You wouldn't want it any other way.

You stared at your phone screen, relinquishing the stress and tension you had from today's chain of events. You felt a smile grow on your face as your eyes connected with the nonexistent character that had narrowly saved you multiple times from ending it all. You only ever smiled when it concerned them nowadays, so if anyone you knew saw you grinning like an idiot right now, you were bound to receive many surprised reactions.

You finally arrive at your destination, the required actions to enter your lonely abode snapping you out of your dreamy daze. You felt your stomach churn as you unlocked your door. You knew exactly what was disrupting your system, but you forced yourself to let it pass and prioritized doing that one thing you had on your mind currently.

Quickly locking your door behind you, you rushed into your room and collapsed at your desk, the familiar notebook and pen just a few inches away from your grasp. You felt something tickle your throat, the object clearly slowly taking away your space to breath. You were so close to suffocating, but you didn't care. You grabbed your notebook and pen and began writing.

The notebook was filled with the many letters you wrote for your loved one. You knew it was all wishful thinking, but obsessing over them wasn't going to be enough anymore. You needed more. You've gone to the point where they felt like a real person to you, even if you were technically missing someone you've never met. 

Tears rolled down your cheek as you forced yourself to write out the words. You wrote about how much you loved them but they were hurting you. You wrote how it wasn't their fault you were in pain but still wished they would stop. You wrote how much you treasured them and just wanted them to tell you everything was gonna be okay. You wrote that if you would die, you promised it would be for them.

You reached your limit and dropped your pen, the air becoming suffocating as you laid there on your desk, all lifeless. You've never wanted them to be with you so much in your whole entire life. You knew you could just vomit the lilies all out and let you last much longer, but that would only delay the result. You refused to let it out as you cried silently, just wanting them to take you away from this place.

The truth was sinking in hard. No matter how much you cried, they wouldn't just pop up and save you from your misery. No matter what you did, you doubted you could ever stop yourself from loving them ever. You were far off the rabbit hole and had no more hope of getting out anymore. 

Your time was short, and you had suddenly lost all hope you ever had to live on. This was a wake up call that you had been living in your dreams for far too long.

Your eyes threatened to fall when you felt a familiar hand lay on your shoulder. Your eyes shot open as you turned around. You felt your body change so drastically all of a sudden, but you were certain you knew exactly why these changes had occurred.

Right there, in front of your very eyes, stood that one person you loved with all your heart. A smile was on their face as they looked at you with pride. "I'm happy you lasted so long up to this point. You did your best. I'm sorry I wasn't able to get here early enough to." They say gently before engulfing you in a hug.

It all felt surreal. It happened all at once. The feeling of suffocation had gone away, your cheeks no longer had tears continuously rolling down them, and your frown… turned into a smile. You knew there must be something behind this for it was too good to be true, but you didn't really care. For now, you melted in their touch, glad to finally be in their arms after years of emptiness.

They pulled away after a period of time, glad to see you have stopped crying. They stood back up straight before lifting your chin up to face them, "Are you ready? I'm here to take you." They say gently, keeping the same smile glued up on their face as you still couldn't help but burst from happiness. You simply nodded, knowing you won't regret anything at all in the end. 

There were consequences, indeed, but they were all very much worth it since you got what you wanted in the end. You knew that because they were fictional, this could only be happening if that one thing had happened. You still had no regrets however, because you were happy.

You were happy to finally be going away for the world you had no place in. You walked away with them, leaving your body behind as the last memory anyone on earth had for you.

Maybe everything does happen for a reason.


End file.
